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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jun 2011
    Location
    Oklahoma
    Posts
    911

    Default Bud the Cowboy

    A cowboy named Bud was overseeing his herd in a remote pasture when suddenly a brand-new BMW advanced toward him out of a cloud of dust.

    The driver, a young man in a Brioni suit, Gucci shoes, RayBan sunglasses and YSL tie, leaned out the window and asked the cowboy, "If I tell you exactly how many cows and calves you have in your herd, Will you give me a calf?"

    Bud looks at the man, obviously a yuppie, then looks at his peacefully grazing herd and calmly answers, "Sure, Why not?"

    The yuppie parks his car, whips out his Dell notebook computer, connects it to his Cingular RAZR V3 cell phone, and surfs to a NASApage on the Internet, where he calls up a GPS satellite to get an exact fix on his location which he then feeds to another NASA satellite that scans the area in an ultra-high-resolution photo.

    The young man then opens the digital photo in Adobe Photoshop and exports it to an image processing facility in Hamburg , Germany .

    Within seconds, he receives an email on his Palm Pilot that the image has been processed and the data stored.

    He then accesses an MS-SQL database through an ODBC connected Excel spreadsheet with email on his Blackberry and, after a few minutes, receives a response.

    Finally, he prints out a full-color, 150-page report on his hi-tech, miniaturized HP LaserJet printer, turns to the cowboy and says, "You have exactly 1,586 cows and calves."

    "That's right. Well, I guess you can take one of my calves," says Bud.

    He watches the young man select one of the animals and looks on with amusement as the young man stuffs it into the trunk of his car.

    Then Bud says to the young man, "Hey, if I can tell you exactly what your business is, will you give me back my calf?"

    The young man thinks about it for a second and then says, "Okay, why not?"

    "You're an aide in the Obama Administration", says Bud.

    "Wow! That's correct," says the yuppie, "but how did you guess that?"

    "No guessing required." answered the cowboy. "You showed up here even though nobody called you; you want to get paid for an answer I already knew, to a question I never asked. You used millions of dollars worth of equipment trying to show me how much smarter than me you are; and you don't know a thing about how working people make a living - or about cows, for that matter. This is a herd of sheep.

    Now give me back my dog.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Aug 2009
    Location
    Asheville, NC
    Posts
    7,962

    Default Re: Bud the Cowboy

    Isn't that the truth.. Sad thing is, it is almost that easy to figure out!!
    FORMER GREEN XJ CLUB MEMBER
    IF YOU DON'T STAND BEHIND OUR TROOPS, FEEL FREE TO STAND IN FRONT OF THEM!!
    DOING SOMETHING JUST BECAUSE YOUR BUDDY DOES IT THAT WAY MAKES AS MUCH SENSE AS SHARING TOOTHBRUSHES

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Mar 2009
    Location
    South TEXAS
    Posts
    7,244

    Default Re: Bud the Cowboy

    I think it seems inappropriate to call Bud a cowboy if he is a sheep herder.
    Hey bubba get your hand off my ass,

    Some days it is just not worth it to gnaw through the leather restraints.

    R.I.P. Brian 96_XJ Perrine 1990-2011

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Sep 2009
    Location
    Chico, CA
    Posts
    29,847

    Default Re: Bud the Cowboy

    Sheepboy? Doesn't have much of a ring to it
    230 hp 4.3L Chevy
    Built 4L60E with manual lockout
    Atlas 4 speed
    Griffin radiator
    On board air
    Warn 9.5ti on custom bumper
    7.5" RE front and bastard pack rear on custom long arms
    30 gal gas tank
    lockers
    And a bunch of other stuff

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Mar 2009
    Location
    South TEXAS
    Posts
    7,244

    Default Re: Bud the Cowboy

    Steve you know cattlemen and sheepherders don't mix. Not here in Tx anyway.
    Hey bubba get your hand off my ass,

    Some days it is just not worth it to gnaw through the leather restraints.

    R.I.P. Brian 96_XJ Perrine 1990-2011

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Sep 2009
    Location
    Chico, CA
    Posts
    29,847

    Default Re: Bud the Cowboy

    I know ....

    Now we could get into Montana sheep jokes.
    230 hp 4.3L Chevy
    Built 4L60E with manual lockout
    Atlas 4 speed
    Griffin radiator
    On board air
    Warn 9.5ti on custom bumper
    7.5" RE front and bastard pack rear on custom long arms
    30 gal gas tank
    lockers
    And a bunch of other stuff

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