Wife got these in an e-mail.

[BlueXJ]

'OLD' IS WHEN...
Your friends compliment you on your new alligator shoes and you're barefoot.

'OLD' IS WHEN...
Going bra-less pulls all the wrinkles out of your face.

'OLD' IS WHEN....
You don't care where your spouse goes, just as long as you don't have to go along.

'OLD' IS WHEN...
You are cautioned to slow down by the doctor instead of by the police ..

'OLD' IS WHEN..
'Getting a little action' means you don't need to take a laxative today.

'OLD' IS WHEN....
'Getting lucky' means you find your car in the parking lot..

'OLD' IS WHEN...
An 'all nighter' means not getting up to use the bathroom.

'OLD' IS WHEN....
You're not sure if these are facts or jokes.

[rguignard]

[4.3LXJ]

I am in denial

[pyrotech]

Amen brother kinda scary though if you think about it the ones that don't apply to me fit th wifey real good!!!!!!!!

[4.3LXJ]

That is when silence is golden

[joshtimber]

Great !

[LizardRunner]

Huh? what? oh dang I forgot already. I do remember Red Skelton saying there were three things that showed you were old. The first one is Your memory starts to leave for parts unknown. I can't remember the other two.

To those that call me old I say "H___ no I'm freaking ancient.

[BlueXJ]

I still have my memory. I can remember playing with my first pet when I was a small boy. Mom made me put him outside when he started to grow into a triceratops and knock over the furniture.