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Thread: Do you know Jack

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Mar 2009
    Location
    South TEXAS
    Posts
    7,244

    Icon11 Do you know Jack

    Join Date: Jun 2009
    Location: Tornado Just Blow Me Alley, Oklahoma U.S.A.
    Posts: 7,697
    Who is Jack Schitt?
    Just in case anyone wanted to know.

    For some time many of us have wondered just who is Jack Schitt?
    We find ourselves at a loss when someone says,
    'You don't know Jack Schitt!' Well, thanks to my genealogy efforts,
    you can now respond in an intellectual way.

    Jack Schitt is the only son of Awe Schitt.
    Awe Schitt, the fertilizer magnate,
    married O. Schitt, the owner of Needeep N. Schitt, Inc.
    They had one son, Jack.

    In turn, Jack Schitt married Noe Schitt.
    The deeply religious couple produced six children:
    Holie Schitt, Giva Schitt, Fulla Schitt, Bull Schitt,
    and the twins Deep Schitt and Dip Schitt.

    Against her parents' objections,
    Deep Schitt married Dumb Schitt, a high school dropout.
    After being married 15 years, Jack and Noe Schitt divorced.
    Noe Schitt later married Ted Sherlock,
    and because her kids were living with them,
    she wanted to keep her previous name.
    She was then known as Noe Schitt Sherlock.

    Meanwhile,Dip Schitt married Loda Schitt,
    and they produced a son with a rather
    nervous disposition named Chicken Schitt.
    Two of the other six children,
    Fulla Schitt and Giva Schitt,
    were inseparable throughout childhood
    and subsequently married the
    Happens brothers in a dual ceremony.
    The wedding announcement in the newspaper
    announced the Schitt-Happens nuptials.
    The Schitt-Happens children were Dawg, Byrd,and Horse.

    Bull Schitt, the prodigal son,
    left home to tour the world.
    He recently returned from Italy with
    his new Italian bride, Pisa Schitt.

    Now when someone says,
    'You don't know Jack Schitt,' you can correct them.

    Sincerely,
    Crock O. Schitt

    NOTE: PLEASE PASS THIS ON TO ANYONE WHO NEEDS A LAUGH.

    REMEMBER: LAUGHING LOWERS THE BLOOD PRESSURE.
    AND THAT AIN'T NOE SCHITT
    __________________
    Jack
    Hey bubba get your hand off my ass,

    Some days it is just not worth it to gnaw through the leather restraints.

    R.I.P. Brian 96_XJ Perrine 1990-2011

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Oct 2010
    Location
    Conroe Tx
    Posts
    532

    Default Re: Do you know Jack

    i had to read that twice i got lost a few times pretty clever

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Sep 2009
    Location
    Chico, CA
    Posts
    29,847

    Default Re: Do you know Jack

    And to think I never knew Jack...
    230 hp 4.3L Chevy
    Built 4L60E with manual lockout
    Atlas 4 speed
    Griffin radiator
    On board air
    Warn 9.5ti on custom bumper
    7.5" RE front and bastard pack rear on custom long arms
    30 gal gas tank
    lockers
    And a bunch of other stuff

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