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Thread: Redneck zoo keeper

  1. #1
    Join Date
    May 2010
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    Kemah Tx.
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    1,674

    Default Redneck zoo keeper

    A small zoo in Mississippi obtained a very rare species of gorilla. Within a few weeks the gorilla, a female, became very difficult to handle.

    Upon examination, the veterinarian determined the problem. The gorilla was in season. To make matters worse, there was no male gorilla available. Thinking about their problem, the Zoo Keeper thought of Bobby Lee Walton, a redneck part-time worker responsible for cleaning the animal cages.

    Bobby Lee, like most rednecks, had little sense but possessed ample ability to satisfy a female of any species. The Zoo Keeper thought they might have a solution. Bobby Lee was approached with a proposition. Would he be willing to mate with the gorilla for 500.00? Bobby Lee showed some interest, but said he would have to think the matter over carefully. The following day, he announced that he would accept their offer, but only under four conditions.

    1. "First", Bobby Lee said, "I ain't gonna kiss her on the lips."
    The Keeper quickly agreed to this condition.

    2. "Second", he said, "You can't never tell no one about this."
    The Keeper again readily agreed to this condition.

    3. "Third", Bobby Lee said, "I want all the children raised Baptist." Once again it was agreed.

    4. And last of all, Bobby Lee stated "You gotta give me another week to come up with the 500.00."
    91 Cherokee RC 4.5 long arm lift ECTED locker in the front Lock Rite locker in the rear Warn front and rear bumpers with 8000lb Warn winch sliders Skyjacker shocks and disconects exterior paint orange/black Rinoline. Roof rack with KC lights. SADLY GONE BUT WON'T BE FORGETEN But hay there is still a XJ in the family

    97 TJ 6" Super Lift lift 2" body lift 37x13.5 tires front and rear OX lockers full roll cage custom made f/r bumpers and sliders made by AAE Customs 8000# Ramsey winch with Kevlar rope and a sound system that can make you ears bleed

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jul 2010
    Location
    Logan UT
    Posts
    1,321

    Support Re: Redneck zoo keeper


    "if yer not larnin sumptin new everday, check yer pulse."

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Sep 2009
    Location
    Chico, CA
    Posts
    29,847

    Default Re: Redneck zoo keeper



    Some people are just plain dangerous to the human race.
    230 hp 4.3L Chevy
    Built 4L60E with manual lockout
    Atlas 4 speed
    Griffin radiator
    On board air
    Warn 9.5ti on custom bumper
    7.5" RE front and bastard pack rear on custom long arms
    30 gal gas tank
    lockers
    And a bunch of other stuff

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Jan 2011
    Location
    Splendora, Tx
    Posts
    187

    Default Re: Redneck zoo keeper


  5. #5
    Join Date
    Feb 2011
    Location
    Lakewood, CO
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    Default Re: Redneck zoo keeper


  6. #6
    Join Date
    Jun 2010
    Location
    Perry County, PA
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    Default Re: Redneck zoo keeper

    Yikes...

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Mar 2009
    Location
    South TEXAS
    Posts
    7,244

    Default Re: Redneck zoo keeper

    I'll sell tickets and we can videotape it to raise further funds, just don't tell Bobby Lee.
    Hey bubba get your hand off my ass,

    Some days it is just not worth it to gnaw through the leather restraints.

    R.I.P. Brian 96_XJ Perrine 1990-2011

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Jun 2010
    Location
    Perry County, PA
    Posts
    623

    Default Re: Redneck zoo keeper

    Lol..Good idea

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Dec 2010
    Location
    Hermiston, Oregon
    Posts
    11

    Default Re: Redneck zoo keeper

    Now that was a good one, even the wife liked that one!!

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