fleas

[BlueXJ]

Two fleas were hanging out one day, and one told the the other about its night. "Hey man, I had a great time last night, I went to the symphony, and I had the best seat in the house, in the conductor's beard. Things were cool until the second movement, when he sneezed, and I was flung into the soprano soloist's cleavage. That wasn't bad , nice and warm and all, but she got all worked up and started to sweat, and I slid down between her legs. I stayed there and fell asleep, but there is one thing I don't get. When I woke up, I was in the conductor's beard again."

[pLEXX]

hahahaha funny joke blue

[BlueXJ]

A woman was cleaning her husbands dresser drawers when she found 3 golf balls and a box with 2000 in it. She waited for him to come home from the golf course to ask him why these things were hidden in his dresser drawer.

The husband said I'm sorry I hid this from you but the truth is every time I cheated on you over the last 30 years I put a golf ball in the drawer.

The wife was very upset at first but after thinking about it said "I guess 3 times in 30 years is really not that bad! Oh by the way what is the 2000 in the drawer.

The husband replied" Well every time I got to a dozen balls I sold them.

[BlueXJ]

Reverend Boudreaux
was
the part-time pastor of the local Cajun Baptist Church and
Pastor
Thibodaux was the minister of the Covenant Church across
the road.



They were both standing by the road, pounding a sign into
the
ground,that read:


'Da End is Near
Turn Yo Sef 'Roun Now

Afore It Be Too Late!'


As a car sped past them, the driver
leaned out his window and yelled,
'You religious nuts!'


From the
curve they heard screeching tires, and a big splash...


Boudreaux
turns to Thibodaux and asks,
'Do ya tink mayba da sign
should
jussay.....'Bridge Out?'

[kryptonitexj]

hahaha those are funny. LMAO

[BlueXJ]

[BlueXJ]

How Cats and Women Are Alike
1. They do what they want.
2. They rarely listen to you.
3. They're totally unpredictable.
4. When you want to play, they want to be alone.
5. When you want to be alone, they want to play.
6. They expect you to cater to their every whim.
7. They're moody.
8. They leave hair everywhere.

How Dogs and Men Are Alike
1. Both keep moving...even when they are lost.
2. Both take up too much space on the bed.
3. Both have irrational fears about the vacuum cleaner.
4. Both are threatened by their own kind.
5. Neither understands what you see in cats.
6. Both want dominance.
7. Both do the dishes by licking them clean.
8. Both chase cars.
9. The larger ones tend to drool.
10. The smaller ones tend to be more nervous