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Thread: Newfoundland Declares War on the U.S.

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Sep 2009
    Location
    Chico, CA
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    Icon12 Newfoundland Declares War on the U.S.

    President
    Barack Obama was in the Oval Office when his telephone
    rang.

    "Hallo,
    President Obama " a heavily accented voice said.
    "This is Archie, up ere at
    the Harp Seal Pub in Badger's Cove , Newfoundland ,
    Canada , eh? I am callin'
    to tells ya dat we are officially declaring war on
    ya!"

    "Well Archie,"
    Barack replied, "This is indeed important news !
    How big is your army ?"


    "Right now," said Archie, after a moments
    calculation "there is
    myself, me cousin Harold , me next-door-neighbor Mick,
    and the whole dart team
    from the pub. That makes eight!"

    Barack paused. "I must tell you
    Archie that I have one million men in my army waiting to
    move on my command."


    "Wow," said Archie. "I'll have ta call
    ya back!"

    Sure enough,
    the next day, Archie called again. " Mr. Obama , the
    war is still on! We have
    managed to acquire some infantry equipment!"

    "And what equipment would
    that be Archie?" Barack asked.

    "Well sir, we have two combines, a
    bulldozer, and Harry 's farm tractor."

    President Obama sighed. "I must
    tell you Archie, that I have 16,000 tanks and 14,000
    armored personnel
    carriers. Also I've increased my army to one and a
    half million since we last
    spoke."

    "Lord above", said Archie, "I'll be
    getting back to ya."


    Sure enough, Archie rang again the next day.. "
    President Obama , the
    war is still on! We have managed to git ourselves
    airborne! We up an' modified
    Harrigan's ultra-light wit a couple of shotguns in
    the cockpit, and four boys
    from the Legion have joined us as well!"

    Barack was silent for a
    minute then cleared his throat. "I must tell you
    Archie that I have 10,000
    bombers and 20,000 fighter planes. My military complex is
    surrounded by
    laser-guided, surface-to-air missile sites. And since we
    last spoke, I've
    increased my army to TWO MILLION!"

    "Jumpins," said Archie, "l'll have
    ta call youse back."

    Sure enough, Archie called again the next day. "
    President Obama ! I am sorry to have to tell you dat we
    have had to call off
    dis 'ere war."

    "I'm sorry to hear that" said Barack .
    "Why the sudden
    change of heart?"

    Well, sir," said Archie, "we've all sat
    ourselves
    down and had a long chat over a bunch of pints, and come
    to realize dat dere's
    no way we can feed two million prisoners.."

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Mar 2009
    Location
    Heppner, Oregon
    Posts
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    Default

    cute!!

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Mar 2009
    Location
    South TEXAS
    Posts
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    Default

    Are there 2 million people in all of Newfouindland??????????????
    Hey bubba get your hand off my ass,

    Some days it is just not worth it to gnaw through the leather restraints.

    R.I.P. Brian 96_XJ Perrine 1990-2011

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Sep 2009
    Location
    Chico, CA
    Posts
    29,847

    Default

    No, that is why they can feed that many prisoners.

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