Gunshot Wound

Aging Mildred was a 93 year old woman who was particularly despondent over the death of her husband Earl. She decided that she would just kill herself and join him in death. Thinking it would be best to get it over quickly, she took out Earl's old Army pistol and made the decision to shoot herself in the heart since it was badly broken in the first place. Not wanting to miss the vital organ and become a vegetable and a burden to someone, she called her doctor's office to inquire as to exactly where the heart would be. " On a woman," the doctor said, " the heart would be just below the left breast." Later that night, Mildred was admitted to the hospital with a gunshot wound to her knee.