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View Full Version : Glad I'm a Man



BlueXJ
04-19-2011, 05:01 PM
I'm glad I'm a man, you better believe.

I don't live off of yogurt, diet coke, or cottage cheese.

I don't B***h to my girlfriends about the size of my breasts.

I can get where I want to - north, south, east or west.

I don't get wasted after only 2 beers

and when I do drink I don't end up in tears.

I won't spend hours deciding what to wear,

I spend 5 minutes max fixing my hair

and I don't go around checking my reflection

in everything shiny from every direction.

I don't whine in public and make us leave early

and when you ask why get all bitter and surly.

I'm glad I'm a man, I'm so glad I could sing.

I don't have to sit around waiting for that ring.

I don't gossip about friends or stab them in the back.

I don't carry our differences into the sack.

I'll never go psycho and threaten to kill you

or think every guy out there's trying to steal you.

I'm rational, reasonable, and logical too

I know what the time is and I know what to do.

And I honestly think it's a privilege for me

to have these two balls and stand when I pee.

I live to watch sports and play all sorts of ball

It's more fun than dealing with women after all.

I won't cry if you figure out it's not going to work

I won't remain bitter and call you a jerk.

Feel free to use me for immediate pleasure

I won't assume it's permanent by any measure.

Yes, I'm glad I'm a man, a man you see

I'm glad I'm not capable of child delivery.

I don't get all B***hy every 28 days

I'm glad that my gender gets me a much bigger raise.

I'm a man by chance and I'm thankful it's true

I;m so glad I'm not a woman like you.

4x4Dalton
04-19-2011, 05:04 PM
:notworthy::notworthy:

prerunner1982
04-19-2011, 05:07 PM
Reminds me of the Brad Paisley song "I'm Still a Guy"....

My eyebrows ain't plucked and there's a gun in my truck...

I don't die my hair and I've still got a pair...

BlueXJ
04-19-2011, 05:21 PM
Yeah I think Brad read this before he wrote that song.